On the first day of Ramadan, Allah swt gave my family the test of losing a loved one.
Even though a week has gone by, it still hurts, I don’t know if will ever truly go away … you know, the feeling.
It’s very strange to me because it does not feel real at all. It seems like yesterday we were speaking on the phone with him every week and laughing.
Like I said this does not feel real at all; I’m constantly thinking about him and the day of his death just keeps replaying in my mind.
The day where I felt like vomiting multiple times as crying. The day where my mind was spinning and everything became a blur. The day where my heart was aching for all those impacted by his death. I didn’t tell any of my friends about it, I just discussed it with my immediate family.
Sometimes I break down at random from just thinking about how his death went down. I wish I could have changed certain things about how it went down but I can’t.
They say that life isn’t fair, but I know that the almighty does not burden a soul beyond that it can bear.
COVID-19 has negatively affected this death because of all the travel restrictions. I know that if COVID-19 was not around, my family could have done so much more to help our loved one but you know, Allah knows best 🙏🏾🙏🏾
Yes I’m still sad, yes I’m still hurting, but I’m also praying and thankful to Allah swt that he lived a long and fulfilling life. Alhamdulillah.
Death is the endpoint of the cycle of life. One day it will be me, and one day it will be you. I find comfort in knowing that my loved one is no longer in pain and passed away on the best day of the week (Friday) and the best month of the year (Ramadan). Subhanallah.
All my family and I can do now is make dua for him.
Always pray for the dead. Always make dua for those you love dead or alive. I hope you’re all staying safe.
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